Lord knows that we all need something to smile about lately so welcome to the latest edition of Funny Things My Kids Have Said Lately, which is actually now becoming funny things my daughter has said lately. Now that my son is nearly 9 years old, he has started to become embarrassed by things and it wouldn’t be right of me to include him in this going forward. Generally, my approach with the kids and this blog/my social media is to ask his permission before I share anything online. However, with this, I know the majority of the time he’s not going to find it funny for me to share it. Never fear though, Lena comes out with hilarious comments on the regular so she’ll keep us going for a while yet until I retire the series when she becomes old enough to care as well.
So without further ado, here’s the latest things that my 5 year old’s has said that made us laugh:
Lena thought I had locked Papa Ginge in Arlo’s bedroom and said to me ‘I like the way you do things Mammy’. She thought she had found a fellow evil genuius comrade in me which is slightly concerning.
Lena to me about my frown lines ‘Mammy these stripes look like a river’. Cheers kid, that’s why I have a fringe.
Me to Lena: ‘Do you want to workout like Mammy when you grow up?’. Lena ‘No, I’m too strong already, you’ve seen the way I punch’.
Lena to me ‘your belly is all wobbly and green’. I’ll give her the wobbly but green?! Slander.
I was listening to a guided meditation with Lena. The orator says ‘you might be worried the tooth fairy has forgotten your address but don’t worry, the tooth fairy knows all the addresses’. Lena turns to me and says ‘I’m not worried she doesn’t have our address. I’m worried she’s dead’. Suffice to say, it’s hard to feel relaxed doing a meditation with Lena.
Lena ‘My pumps don’t smell for me. They only smell when I make them angry’. She must make them angry a lot tbh.
Lena ‘Do grown up boys have those things that grown up girls do? The wee bloods?’ We may need further conversations about periods.
Lena: ‘I need to put my clothes on the ‘radi-gator’ to dry’
Lena referring to Nicole Kidman: ‘I want to watch a film with the orange one in’.
Lena trying to explain to me about Mummies: ‘Do you know that there is another kind of mammy? A one that is wrapped up in toilet paper for clothes?’.
Lena asking me what’s for dinner ‘Mammy you aren’t going to make something awful that looks disgusting again are you?!’. Gee, thanks kid!
Lena shouting at Arlo angrily ‘Arlo, I will pull the bones out of your body’. Yikes, run Arlo, run.
Lena looking at Arlo ‘Do I have a squashed head like Arlo mammy or a circle head like you’. After much deduction we figured out she meant a narrow face or a round face.
Lena on sushi ‘No, I don’t like slooshie thank you’.
I hope these gave you a little chuckle. We never have a dull moment with Lena. I just adore the way her little mind works.
If you liked this post you might also enjoy some of the previous instalments of funnt things my kids have said lately:
- 10 funniest things my 4 year old has said lately – September 2016
- 15 funny things my 4 year old has said this Christmas – December 2016
- 13 funny things my five year old has said lately – April 2017
- 10 funny things my 5-year-old has said lately – June 2017
- Funny things my kids have said lately – October 2017
- 10 funny things my kids have said lately – March 2018
- 10 funny things have said lately – January 2019
- Funny things my kids have said lately – instalment 8 – June 2019
- 10 funny things my kids have said lately – instalment 9 – May 2020
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